Schrodinger's Chef Bread out of rocks? Grapes out of gloves? I gotchu

1
This Artifact grants you the power to enhance your tools beyond mundane limits.
Used by Delphyrion Arcanis, Created by Cryst0lline.
( You must use this Artifact obviously when activating this Effect.)

The gift appears to be a large backpack. One can put any object inside and loudly declares, while holding the backpack, "If only I had [food item]". Be sure that there are no other items in the backpack, because they will be consumed.
(Note that one cannot request a whole dish; for example, they can order plain macaroni, but not mac and cheese).

Open the backpack after five minutes to reveal the requested food item, whose output weight matches that of the input. The taste of the food will depend on the value of the object. Make sure it's exactly 5 minutes. Who knows what'll happen if it isn't.
Black goo will always seep out from the bottom of the backpack when in use.

On the backpack:
It's easy enough to mistake for any backpack at all, and Delphyrion has not put a label on it. They have lost quite a few beakers and pens to it whenever they mused about their next experiment, as they often reach epiphanies by saying, "If only I had [food item]". Perhaps that's why the artifact works this way.

On food quality:
For some reason the output quality directly ties to the price of food in Orlando. So, put a 5-cent pencil in the backpack, and you'll get a 5-cent quality potato fry.
Also, yeah, make sure it's 5 minutes exactly. This is a theoretical number; no one has tried to test its limits, hence its reference to Schrodinger.
(On a critical fail, one fails to retrieve the food in time and it is either underdeveloped or spoiled.)

On the black goo:
Delphyrion themself isn't sure what it is, nor do they ever remember to analyze it. It doesn't seem to leave any residue on the backpack itself, though it stains quite horribly on porous material including skin. With enough washes it should go away.
If consumed, call the Poison Control Center and pray.
(Also pray that you are not Dephyrion, the chemist who has had 0 interaction with any religion at all, and therefore still thinks priests can get pregnant.)

On Madness:
One gets uncontrollably angry at the sight or mention of any food that did not come out of the backpack. It feels as if one is running a state-of-the-art restaurant, yet people line up for the nearby McDonald's instead. Delphyrion feels this way towards content farms like 1-minute arts.


Expend a point of Battery and spend a minute. Select a non-Alien Device within arm's reach. Roll a single D10 as a critical failure check. If you roll a 1, the Effect fails, and you think the backpack has created the intended food item. In fact, it appears and smells more delightful than it should, to the point that you are urged to eat it right away no matter what. You will develop Vertigo upon eating the food as it turns out to be incredibly poisonous. Cannot be used to improve Armor.

Lasts the next two hours. Your target receives 2 extra dice to all actions taken for its intended use. Attacking with an upgraded weapon grants +2 Weapon Damage instead of additional dice.

Anyone who touches this Artifact will notice it warping their mind and may drop it. If they choose to hold or use it, they immediately receive the following Trauma: No Outside Food - upon sight or mention of food that you did not create, roll Self-Control to contain the urge to cannibalize yourself or the person who brought up the food. If they lose possession of this Artifact, the Trauma heals over the course of the next day.

  • Reminder: additional Weapon Damage granted by this Effect does not stack with any other bonus to Weapon Damage. Instead the largest bonus is used. The same is true for extra dice.
  • Extra dice from this Effect do not apply to Gift activation rolls.
  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.
  • Your target must be within line of sight, or within range of another sense if more fitting for the Gift's flavor.

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Community Targeted Gifts

The latest manuscript described blood sorcery and necromantic methods of reanimating flesh and spirits. At first appalled by the horrible methods, the Doctor applied their knowledge of modern medicine, minimizing the drawbacks and streamlining the healing processes. Now with a rudimentary understanding of occult practice, the Doctor is able to apply this Black Medicine to treat patients, and have expanded their understanding of the human condition, and the pieces that animate it.

Exert your Mind and spend an hour. Select a Living target within arm's reach. Select up to four Battle Scars on your target to treat.

The treated Battle Scars heals as you finish activating this Effect. If used on a Battle Scar caused by an Unstabilized Injury, that Injury is Stabilized.

You cannot re-attempt to treat the same Battle Scar more than once a month. Your patient is required to not sprint for the next month. If they violate this rule, your treatment is immediately reversed.

You may choose to spend an Action activating this Effect instead of the normal cast time. If you do, the Battle Scar only remains healed for one day, after which it reverts to its original state.

  • The patient is aware of the after-care requirement.
  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.
  • Your target must be within line of sight, or within range of another sense if more fitting for the Gift's flavor.

Use up this Stone-Carved Glyph and spend an Action to activate. Select a target within arm's reach. Roll Brawn + Occult at Difficulty 6. The target] may contest by Defending or Dodging.

If you succeed, your target will be restricted at their location by a physical, tangible binding. They can still move their arms and use Effects, but cannot move to a new location.

The binding around a target must be destroyed in order for them to break free. Breaking the binding requires a total amount of damage equal to twice the contested Outcome from the Effect activation. Damage from multiple attacks is cumulative and stacks linearly.

  • This consumable is destroyed when used and cannot be used again.
  • For entities whose movement could be considered an attack (e.g. a kaiju), the GM may rule that they are merely slowed instead of fully restricted.
  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.

Expend a point of Battery and spend an Action. Select a Sapient being, human, or Dead target within 50 feet. Dead targets must have died within the past week, and you must have their remains in your possession. This Effect cannot be used unless both you & the target are completely in shadow.

The target can communicate in your language for the next hour.

  • The target of "human" refers to any target that speaks a human language.
  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.
  • Your target must be within line of sight, or within range of another sense if more fitting for the Gift's flavor.

Exert your Mind and spend a minute to activate. Select a Sapient target within arm's reach. You must actively and obviously use Candy to activate this Effect. At the end of your investigation, roll Brawn + Alertness at Difficulty 6.

You learn all the following information about your target:

  • You learn a hidden desire of the target. Roll Outcome determines the relevancy / secret-ness of the desire.
  • You learn the target's name, nicknames, screen names, and aliases.

The quality and specificity of information gained depends on your Outcome.

  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.

Exert your Mind to activate. Select a Living target within arm's reach. Over the course of one Downtime, your patient must communicate with you and reveal at least one of their Traumas to you, including the details of those Traumas and the circumstances of how they were acquired. After the full treatment time has elapsed, roll Charisma + Influence at Difficulty 6.

Your target may Resist. If your treatment is successful, you may remove one of the patient's revealed Traumas without incurring any Experience cost.

  • The treatment time may be broken up into multiple sessions if necessary.
  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.
  • Your target must be within line of sight, or within range of another sense if more fitting for the Gift's flavor.

Stock Targeted Gifts

Exert your Mind and spend a minute. Investigate an area with a radius of up to 100 feet Can only be activated while you are in the wilderness. At the end of your investigation, roll Perception + Survival at Difficulty 6.

You learn the following information about the area:

  • You can tell which entities lay claim to each part of the area and how these borders have shifted over time.
  • You learn where exactly creatures and people live within the area, and what sorts of creatures they are.
The quality and specificity of information gained depends on your Outcome.

You cannot investigate the same area more than once per day.

  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.
  • Your target must be within line of sight, or within range of another sense if more fitting for the Gift's flavor.

Exert your Mind and an Action. Select a Inanimate target within arm's reach which could fit inside a briefcase (15 liters). You must actively and obviously use a pointed hat with stars and moons to activate this Effect.

Your target will become Animated indefinitely. You may choose to end the effect at will, as a Free Action. You can maintain a max of 4 targets animated at once.

Animated Objects have the following restrictions and capabilities:

  • Awareness: Animated targets are capable of perceiving the world around them within reasonable limits. They cannot communicate in a clear or coherent way.
  • Movement: Animated targets can use an existing method of locomotion (wheels, etc); otherwise they can move across the ground at 15 feet per round, or hover up to a height of 7 feet in the air at 10 feet per round.
  • Combat: Animated objects cannot take offensive actions in combat.
  • Artifacts: Animating an Artifact does not grant the animated object access to any Effects built in to that Artifact.
  • Ability Use: If an action requires a roll, Animated objects have a dice pool of 7 when performing a task for which they were designed, and a dice pool of 4 for taking any other actions.
  • Toughness: Animated targets are as easy to destroy as they were prior to being animated. If destroyed, the effect ends.
  • Following Orders: Animated objects are controlled by the GM, and will follow any commands you give them, as long as they don't require problem-solving.

  • A task for which an object was designed might include a broom sweeping, a gun shooting things, a car driving, a towel rubbing up on stuff, etc.
  • Animated objects may be more or less susceptible to certain attacks at GMs discretion. A scarecrow golem would be easily destroyed by a sword (or fire). An animated suit of armor may not fear bullets but could be smashed to bits with a hammer. A full bronze statue is largely indestructible but might have difficulty standing up if toppled.
  • If an indestructible object is animated, the animation ends in any event where the base object would have been destroyed.
  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.
  • Your target must be within line of sight, or within range of another sense if more fitting for the Gift's flavor.

This Effect activates whenever someone talks about you. It does not require an Action or Exertion. Select a target Location within 75 feet. Your target should be intuitively based on the triggering event.

You may perceive things through hearing as if you were standing at that Location for the next 30 minutes. You must maintain Concentration to keep up the effect. You cannot perceive anything at your physical location while the effect is active.

  • When triggered, the Effect activation resolves immediately after the triggering Action. It is not Reaction speed.
  • This does not satisfy the Line of Sight requirement for targeted Effects.

Spend one minute. Select a Sapient target or a Creature within arm's reach. You must actively converse with the individual in question for one minute in order to gather any information. At the end of your investigation, roll Perception + Medicine at Difficulty 6. The target may Resist.

You learn all the following information about your target:

  • You determine any medical or physiological issues they have, as well as their species and a general overview of their biology.
  • You learn a full medical history, including past injuries and illnesses as well as the healing process involved.

The quality and specificity of information gained depends on your Outcome.

This Gift cannot have more than 3 Drawbacks, and its Gift Cost is capped at 2.

You cannot investigate the same target more than once per day.

  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.
  • Your target must be within line of sight, or within range of another sense if more fitting for the Gift's flavor.

Exert your Mind and spend an Action. You must actively and obviously use your instrument to activate this Effect. The area within 25 feet of you immediately and obviously becomes imminently dangerous. Roll Charisma + Performance at Difficulty 6. Targets inside the radius may attempt an appropriate Reaction at GM’s discretion. Finding a physical barrier to use as cover will cut total Damage taken in half (applies after Reaction roll but before Armor).

If the Outcome is positive, your blast hits everything within 25 feet of you with Damage equal to your Outcome + 4. If you botched the activation roll, you will also take full Damage from the blast, otherwise it will not hurt you.

You may only use this Effect once per day.

  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.
  • Your target must be within line of sight, or within range of another sense if more fitting for the Gift's flavor.