Schrodinger's Chef Bread out of rocks? Grapes out of gloves? I gotchu

1
This Artifact grants you the power to enhance your tools beyond mundane limits.
Used by Delphyrion Arcanis, Created by Cryst0lline.
( You must use this Artifact obviously when activating this Effect.)

The gift appears to be a large backpack. One can put any object inside and loudly declares, while holding the backpack, "If only I had [food item]". Be sure that there are no other items in the backpack, because they will be consumed.
(Note that one cannot request a whole dish; for example, they can order plain macaroni, but not mac and cheese).

Open the backpack after five minutes to reveal the requested food item, whose output weight matches that of the input. The taste of the food will depend on the value of the object. Make sure it's exactly 5 minutes. Who knows what'll happen if it isn't.
Black goo will always seep out from the bottom of the backpack when in use.

On the backpack:
It's easy enough to mistake for any backpack at all, and Delphyrion has not put a label on it. They have lost quite a few beakers and pens to it whenever they mused about their next experiment, as they often reach epiphanies by saying, "If only I had [food item]". Perhaps that's why the artifact works this way.

On food quality:
For some reason the output quality directly ties to the price of food in Orlando. So, put a 5-cent pencil in the backpack, and you'll get a 5-cent quality potato fry.
Also, yeah, make sure it's 5 minutes exactly. This is a theoretical number; no one has tried to test its limits, hence its reference to Schrodinger.
(On a critical fail, one fails to retrieve the food in time and it is either underdeveloped or spoiled.)

On the black goo:
Delphyrion themself isn't sure what it is, nor do they ever remember to analyze it. It doesn't seem to leave any residue on the backpack itself, though it stains quite horribly on porous material including skin. With enough washes it should go away.
If consumed, call the Poison Control Center and pray.
(Also pray that you are not Dephyrion, the chemist who has had 0 interaction with any religion at all, and therefore still thinks priests can get pregnant.)

Expend a point of Battery and spend a minute. Select a non-Alien Device within arm's reach. Roll a single D10 as a critical failure check. If you roll a 1, the Effect fails, and you think the backpack has created the intended food item. In fact, it appears and smells more delightful than it should, to the point that you are urged to eat it right away no matter what. You will develop Vertigo upon eating the food as it turns out to be incredibly poisonous. Cannot be used to improve Armor.

Lasts the next two hours. Your target receives 2 extra dice to all actions taken for its intended use. Attacking with an upgraded weapon grants +2 Weapon Damage instead of additional dice.

Anyone who touches this Artifact will notice it warping their mind and may drop it. If they choose to hold or use it, they immediately receive the following Trauma: You get uncontrollably angry at the sight or mention of any food that did not come out of the backpack. It feels as if you are running a state-of-the-art restaurant, yet people line up for the nearby McDonald's instead. You must roll Self-Control to contain the urge to cannibalize yourself or the person who brought up the food. If they lose possession of this Artifact, the Trauma heals over the course of the next day.

  • Reminder: additional Weapon Damage granted by this Effect does not stack with any other bonus to Weapon Damage. Instead the largest bonus is used. The same is true for extra dice.
  • Extra dice from this Effect do not apply to Gift activation rolls.
  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.
  • Your target must be within line of sight, or within range of another sense if more fitting for the Gift's flavor.

You are viewing an old version of this Gift.
To view the most recent version Click Here

Revision purchased with:
Improvement from running The Vermilion Manor spent on adjusting power: Schrodinger's Chef
Revision purchased with:
Gift from playing in Crois deora spent on new power: Schrodinger's Chef
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Community Artifact Crafting Gifts

Exert your Mind and spend an Action. Select a Location within 10 feet.

You place a ward, which is fixed to its initial location. You can perceive with all your senses through the ward as though you were standing at its location. This Artifact may have at most 1 wards active at once.

The ward requires Concentration to monitor, though it will remain active until you deactivate it. The presence of the Ward is obvious to anyone being watched by it, and it can be destroyed by mundane means.

You may destroy the Ward to activate one Investigate Individual, Object, or Area Effect as though you were standing at its location.

Whenever something crosses into the observational range of the Ward, you and those you've allowed to tune in are alerted by fox scream.

You may only use this Effect once per day.

  • Full Spectrum: This investigation Effect is as obvious as it would normally be. The Effect is targeted as though you were standing at the location of the Ward. You must pay all activation costs and satisfy all activation requirements of the Effect.
  • Your ward cannot be used to satisfy the line of sight requirement for targeted Effects.
  • You can target yourself if you qualify as a valid target by the other requirements.
  • Your target must be within line of sight, or within range of another sense if more fitting for the Gift's flavor.

You gain the following benefits as long as you are wearing this Artifact.

Your senses are enhanced in the following way.

  • Sight: You can see perfectly in dark and even pitch-black environments. You suffer no dice penalty due to darkness.
  • Touch: You can identify any material with a touch and immediately find what you are looking for when rummaging, assuming it is actually present. You may withdraw items from your bags with a Quick Action instead of an Action.

Any heightened senses require you to maintain Concentration to use, and do not apply to any passive Perception checks.

Anyone who touches this Artifact will notice it warping their body and may drop it. If they choose to hold or use it, they immediately receive the following Battle Scar: Crackling Veins - Electricity surges through your arms to enhance the senses, producing a blue glow and the crackle of static under the skin. You take a -2 dice penalty to all Stealth rolls, and direct skin contact with metal surfaces produces an electric spark. If they lose possession of this Artifact, the Battle Scar heals over the course of the next day.

  • “Rummaging" means digging through trash, finding a needle in a haystack, etc.

You gain the following benefits as long as you are Rich. and you are wearing this Artifact.

You have 4 Armor, which reduces incoming Damage. Armor from multiple sources does not stack. Called Shots may circumvent your Armor, depending on its coverage.

You gain the following benefits as long as you are wearing this Artifact.

You get +2 dice to any Body resistance rolls you make. You also gain the following effects:

  • Internal Awareness: You are automatically aware of and may diagnose any disease, toxin, drug, or similar which enters your system.
  • Got It Bad: If you fail to fully resist an Effect, your Outcome is considered to be 0.

  • These bonuses apply only to Body rolls made to resist Effects and other supernatural phenomena. They do not apply to other contexts such as attacks made while under the Creature Transformation Effect.

Brought to life by the care, creativity, and labor poured into each fold by its creator, this artifact requires a similar degree of attention as maintenance for its spark to remain-- similar to a fire receiving kindling for its flame. This typically means unfolding and refolding its patterns and shape, either manually or through command.

This Artifact can be used as a shuriken. It is roughly the same size as a shuriken and just as difficult to conceal.

Attack by rolling Dexterity + Athletics, Difficulty 6. Successful attacks deal Contested Outcome +0 Weapon Damage.

This item is a living thing. When targeted, it counts as a Living Creature in addition to its other target types. If destroyed or abandoned for more than two days, it dies and becomes unusable.

You also gain the following effects:

  • Remote Control: You may choose to deploy this Artifact in drone mode. Each Round it is deployed, instead of attacking, you may spend a Quick Action to have it attack a target with 8 dice. You may end drone mode as a Quick Action on your initiative. This weapon may Attack up to once per Round.
  • Return: When you throw this weapon, you may opt to have it return to your possession at the end of the attack. Whoever threw this artifact last may use an Action to recall it from up to 100 feet away, attacking one target in its return path as they do so.
  • Shredder: If you successfully hit your target, the value of any Armor they are wearing is reduced by 2. For material armor, this penalty lasts until it is repaired. For intrinsic armor, it lasts until the end of Combat and any relevant wound is healed.

  • Reminder: additional Weapon Damage granted by this Effect does not stack with any other bonus to Weapon Damage. Instead the largest bonus is used.

Stock Artifact Crafting Gifts

You gain the following benefits as long as you are wearing this Artifact.

You get +0 dice to any Mind resistance rolls you make. You also gain the following effects:

  • Naturally Resistant: Any time you make a Mind resistance roll, the individual who you are resisting must Exert their Mind, or your resistance succeeds automatically.
  • Clash Of Wills: If you fail to fully resist an Effect, your Outcome is considered to be 0.

  • These bonuses apply only to Mind rolls made to resist Effects and other supernatural phenomena. They do not apply to Trauma rolls or self-control rolls.

You gain the following benefits as long as you are wearing this Artifact.

You get +2 dice to any Body resistance rolls you make. You also gain the following effects:

  • Survivor: You are immune to all non-Alien diseases.
  • All Brawn No Brain: You suffer a -2 dice penalty on Mind resistance rolls.

  • These bonuses apply only to Body rolls made to resist Effects and other supernatural phenomena. They do not apply to other contexts such as attacks made while under the Creature Transformation Effect.