GA5-1921

Dear Dairy Ii had a really really wierd dream yesternigjt

so i went to bed and i thought i was in a big uhh the big ciorcle. Like. For fights. Like the ones in the rowman books and i had to fight some people like a mime

the mime was very funny and had a funny face but i was relly angry at him for some reson and so i punched him until he collapsed im sorry mime i dont even know you but the people on the chairs seemed happy that i won and it did feel good to win i think

there was someone else i foght but i forgot who it was i should tell cain about this dream i think he woyld like it alot becaus he likes it when i punch things well that arnt my tv or the wall or myself and mimes arnt any of those things

Since the last time I went on one of these jobs, I've been mostly trying to readjust to my daily schedule now that I've experienced someone dying while on one of these. One day, one which was similar to the rest at first, I heard a tap at the door to open it and realise it was that Crab from the last job I was on. And the weirder part of this is that it seems as if I could understand him? He said something about being bored of the Philippines and wanting a new place to stay. As well as this he briefly mentioned being invited by the Kraken over the internet. I don't know how but this must be something to do with that app he keeps trying to get me to download, blubber. So now I have a crab as a roommate along with already having the disembodied voice of the Kraken in trident form.  

It seems as if Midas chose me for this one as well for a reason. Not only because of my experience with the Sons but also all of the other contactors were sea creatures, and I do have a tenuous link to that world being linked to a remnant of the Kraken. Speaking of, I should introduce my co-workers for the job. There was David Jones, a pirate who was also an anthropomorphic squid as well as Cadbury, a human sized mantis shrimp and crab who was just a regular crab (the Kraken didn't particularly enjoy me referring to him that way though). We started off on the ship of David Jones, a little while off the boat we were supposed to board as it had been taken over by the Sons, seemingly due to the wealth of magical artefacts on board. It seemed as if David and Cadbury were taking their time to deliberate once introductions were over so I decided to take action by throwing Crab as far as I could and swimming up to the ship as well myself. This meant, once we got to the boat, we started picking off people while waiting for David and Cadbury. Once they arrived the boat seemed to be on high alert so it seems that they took a lot of damage since me and crab were being especially cautious. Once everyone on the top was dealt with, we started making our way through the ship and had a look round, along with giving rudimentary first aid to David. Once we had a look round, more people started coming down so we had to deal with those before continuing on. Because more people kept coming though, I urged the others to keep going while I held the rest off. I expected to die then and there but I guess I was just lucky. Once the eight men were dealt with, I kept going further down, finding a room with some kind of weird bottles and later finding where the rest of the group had gone. I got grabbed by someone but I didn't take my chances in this life or death situation and immediately stabbed him. It was only after this that I had realised I had stumbled onto where the captain was with 15 or more people with her. Even that bastard Baxter was with her. The subsequent fight was life threatening. If it wasn't for each of the group formulating plans in their head that all came together well as well as the intervention of Midas, we would all be dead. Sadly not everyone could be saved though, in the end David still ended up dying. Not only that but now due to the deal with Midas I mentioned, the Kraken now has some level of control over me. That can't be good, I don't think an angry primordial entity will want much good from me. Either way, We still killed all the SoA members and most of the hired guns on the ship in the end.

I have been hired for one of these odd jobs again. Not doing anything similar to last time or even hired by the same person but he identified to me that he worked for the same agency. Not only that, but he identified himself as Midas. Most likely THAT Midas. Before this when his co-worker identified himself as Eros I assumed it was only a shared name but maybe not. So Midas briefed me on the contract and it involved an Expo we needed to go to that had been infiltrated by a group known as the Sons of Ahab. The name wasn't exactly familiar to me but it did spark some quite negative feelings for the voice in my head, mostly an urge to kill. Speaking of, in this time the voice identified itself as the Kraken. I don't exactly know how I keep stumbling upon mythological figures but oh well. When Midas teleported me to this Expo, I met who I would be working with. A posh looking Russian man named Haley, a Japanese businessman named Tachibana and a young girl named Boe. At least this group seemed like they'd have an easier time blending in like normal people compared to the last group. We surveyed the are and I found a large amount of SoA members around the expo, talking to and vaguely threatening some while also finding people others had replaced on the security team. While I was doing this, of course the rest of the group were doing their own things of course. most notable was Tachibana who had ended up killing someone in the bathroom. If time wasn't of the essence I probably would've helped him out but that wasn't much of an option. From here I left to go on the VIP tour to check if there was any more to gleam on what exactly was happening here and how to stop it. I snuck off into another room where they were doing experiments on some mutated sea creatures, with a scientist named Baxter following me in. While this happened Boe helped out with keeping attention off me. I freed the creature, with something in my mind telling me that was the right call, and ended up fighting the scientists there. The last thing I remember is Baxter turning out to betray me, despite pretending to not know about what was going on in there. I ended up passing out from him shocking me with a taser, after which I woke up on Blackpool pier, needing to get back to Bolton somehow.

Today, I got hired to act in a panto. The play itself was certainly somewhat strange, there was something up with the previous play so we needed to improvise Jack and the Beanstalk. That wasn't exactly what about it was weird though. It was more so that the person who came to ask me about it was inhumanly tall and had four arms. After agreeing (not really fully sure why, it may have been due to the promise of supernatural power that could help with the whole thing with that trident), I was teleported to that one theatre in Blackburn. On getting there I met a talking Octopus called Otto, a talking shrimp called Cadbury and some dude named Haley. These guys were the people I needed to perform the play with, although I don't really get why the audience didn't really react to Otto or Cadbury. Oh well, it doesn't really matter to me. I know the weird things happening constantly seem to be rolling over me but I've really learned to roll with the punches since the whole thing of catching a trident in the sea accidentally happened. Going on these jobs I will most likely see and do things that are much more strange than that (in fact it is probably an eventuality), but for now that has at least set me up for the idea of experiencing weird and supernatural things like talking animals. Anyway, I ended up calling some people from the drama department at uni to help with the panto. Not to skimp out on the details of what actually happened though but the play was fucking stupid, that's about it.

Nikki: Please, take a seat. I’ll start off with a few introductory questions to get a good grasp on what we’re going to be talking about if we continue these and if we find a path that will be helpful for you, we can go down it and discuss whatever needs to be discussed to help you. Is that okay?

Edward: Yes, that is fine by me.

Nikki: Okay, well let’s get started Edward. Should I call you Edward or would you prefer something else?

Dr. Graves: I believe that in this room we should have a strictly professional relationship of therapist and patient which is free of a pre-existing relationship and, by extension, any sort of bias. So I believe that, during sessions, it would likely be beneficial for me to be referred to as Dr. Graves.

Nikki: I see. Well what is it that is making you want to come to these sessions, Dr. graves? Is there something you wish to deal with?

Dr. Graves: Yes actually, I have a complicated issue stemming from myself and being brought to light by the contracts.

Nikki: What’s the issue?

Dr. Graves: I have, for a long time, held contempt for my powers and my… current state of being for their relationship to death. And yet even when I start to learn to overcome this, I still feel its effects on me.

Nikki: How so?

Dr. Graves: This has caused me to be unsure of my own position on life and death. I’ve always considered all life as sacred because of what I lost, myself. I lost the chance of a normal life and so I believed everyone deserved their shot at life. But what if I was wrong? What if the crimes of some people are so heinous that not only does it feel as if you need to get rid of them for the safety of others, but also feels good to do?

Nikki: Are you suggesting there has been someone you have enjoyed killing?

Dr. Graves: I don’t know. Maybe. I hope not.

Nikki: Before we further explore this, it could be beneficial to explore the context of this. That is, if you consent obviously. I have a power, one which I believe you have seen me use on others during the contracts. If we have physical contact, I can learn many things about you, and you me. This includes the nature of any time we’ve killed, any trauma we have and what you are against as a person. For some people, that may be something like murder. For others, maybe sin or harm to animals.

Dr. Graves: If you believe it will help then we should do it.

…

Nikki: I see, that is a lot of people. Do you want to talk about it?

Dr. Graves: Which part?

Nikki: We can start with why and then move on to how it all made you feel.

Dr, graves: The why is simple. They were all pure evil. They all consistently toyed with innocent lives like they were nothing. And for how it made me feel, that one is harder to answer. Each time, there was a deep sense of shame and regret. But before that? I felt just. And then righteous. And then powerful. And that scares me.

Nikki: You felt powerful? What exactly about it was the part that made you feel powerful? Was it the act itself or the effect of that action? Or maybe the amount of lives you believe you may have saved with your action?

Dr. Graves: I… I think possibly the act of snuffing out the life of someone who has committed horrible, unspeakable acts, it… it feels as if you’re doing what is right. Bringing about poetic justice. It’s difficult to admit but there may be a sense of pleasure to come from it. A catharsis of sorts. And that’s precisely what I’m worried about.

Nikki: When I think about the concept of murder, I often think about why I don’t even though it would be so much simpler at times. At one point in my life I was somewhat of a delinquent and ended up getting into a fight with someone who was belligerent, with that ending with a punch and him dying from hitting his head on the pavement. I’m sure you knew that part from our contact but after that, I ended up talking to his sister. I realised the consequences and effects that these kinds of things could have on others. Someone who could be one thing to one person can be completely different to another. Someone that you kill could be a mother or a husband.

Dr. Graves: And what if that mother or that husband was a mass murderer? One without any sort of remorse? Is that still the same?

Nikki: That person is still capable of redemption. They can still see the error of their actions and choose to atone and do better. No one is beyond saving. It’s only a matter of if they accept it.

…

Dr. Graves: I apologise, I’m being called by my partner, Detective O’Neal. I will need to go but before we meet again, if we do so, I’ll give what we have discussed a thought.

Cloudy

You may ask yourself,
"What is that beautiful house?"
You may ask yourself,
"Where does that highway go to?"
And you may ask yourself,
"Am I right, am I wrong?"
And you may say to yourself,
"My God, what have I done?"

No one ever comes into this convenience store. It’s broken down, practically a junkyard fitted into a tight two-storey building. The ceilings are leaky, the tv’s play intermittent static. The news broadcasts are nothing but tragedies.

And the clerk is full of smiles, a face like sunshine, with tanned skin and a nose splattered by freckles. They tell me their name, and that they’re twenty-something, living off this job and a few others to gain enough money to move out of their crappy old apartment. They appreciate the coffee I bring them, and the fact I am one of the few customers who sticks around. They appreciate the conversations we have as I lean against the desk, gum and the sticky residue of spilt coke covering it, coating the fibres of my jacket. 

Despite all of this, I think they find me odd. Off-putting, something I can never shake. People have a sense for things, and I set off alarms no matter how sweet I am. No amount of gifts or chats can change this. Unfortunate. 

I thought the clerk might’ve been more interesting to me then they actually were. We didn’t click.

And now no one at all comes into this convenience store. It’s still broken down, still the same junkyard fitted into a tight two-storey building. The ceilings are leaky, the tv’s play intermittent static. The news broadcasts are nothing but tragedies. 
And the clerk is missing, a chalked outline behind police tape the only evidence of a human life. Tanned skin mutated into a twisted pattern of green and purple, bloating out of the torn clothing. A nose splattered by blood and fractured across their face. I know their name, and that they’re twenty something, that they’re dead in the middle of a harshly lit aisle 3. They scream like a child, and broke off a nail trying to claw themselves away. They gasp and nod, telling me they always appreciated our conversations we had..as I lean against the desk, gum and the sticky residue of spilt coke covering it, coating the fibres of my jacket.

I see why no one uses this store, now.

Same as it ever was,
same as it ever was,
same as it ever was,
same as it ever was.

Guess who’s finally making it out there! That’s right, me, AND I’m writing all my adventures up. No more will my business be a side store, we’re going to be expanding! 

It started when this man-Midas-showed up and asked ME to help, I mean, of course he would right. I’m pretty much the best at my trade..whatever that is at this point. And even better, everyone there practically folded in my presence, believed I was absolutely unharmable by their powers. There was also, what was his name? Sun Wukong, nice guy, unfortunately I am nicer than him. We spent a while arguing on who should go ahead first. He will not be out-mannering me, I can promise you that purple work notebook.

I have to say, it all hurt though. You won’t believe how close to death I came, I think one mpre injury and I would’ve been GONE…but I hung on, and despite how awful I felt afterwards..and the day after, the adrenaline and the sick missing eye sort of made up for it.

I think that without me and the fact I was the one to outlast those creatures, the rest of them would’ve succumbed too.

Probably..